Let me just say this first and get it out of the way. These are my beliefs, my opinions, and my standards I live by. This is not to bash anyone or make anyone feel bad. Now we can get started.

Being abstinent is not intended to be used for control, manipulation, or deceit to get something out of someone else such as a commitment, material things, etc. Abstinent simply means I love myself and God enough not to give my body away. Truth be told Saints, your body doesn’t belong to you anyway. So how can you give someone something that’s not yours. I’ll wait until my marital night. No, I am not a virgin at a very young age I was molested. Later in my high school years I was raped. Then in my college years I was sexually abused. So not only did I not know my worth, but my perspective of men, sex, intimacy, dating, etc. was very warped in my mind. Now after being celibate for 12+ years my life has a new outlook, and a brighter future. I became celibate and got the healing I needed to love again the right way. The Godly way. To be honest I didn’t know how long it had been until October 2015 when someone asked me. I didn’t keep a record. However I do keep a record of the things I’m learning on this journey. Here are a few: 1.) A man that doesn’t honor your celibate decision by making advances on you is selfish 2.) A man that won’t protect your virtue won’t protect your heart. 3.) The enemy has his own set of temptations lined up for you so there’s no need to help him out by adding to it. I want to be pure for my family. I want to be the example for my children and those watching my life. So I can show them as well as tell them that its achievable. I want to be able to connect with them when they have a stumbling block in front of them. Teach them that they are valuable, set apart, of a royal family. Often times we don’t understand just how valuable we are. When we don’t understand the value we leave it up to someone else to price. I want them to not only understand but have embedded in their hearts that they are worth the wait…